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Sunday, February 17, 2013

A Box of Chocolates

With the day of St. Valentine behind us,  the candy wrappers strewn about, the roses wilting from your special day, I have been contemplating relationships. How can you not with the mass media blitz to buy your sweetie just the right thing ( the 3 deep line around the roses in Whole Foods says a lot!) so that they can coo and gush to all their friends about how thoughtful you were and all will be right in the Kingdom of Happily Ever After. Look through rose colored glasses much? Relationships, to borrow and ad lib from the iconic Forest Gump-" are like a box of chocolates, you just never know what you're gonna get." Understated and so true. When you consider stepping into that interaction between two human beings, it is just like looking at that beautifully wrapped box of sweetness, full of anticipation, but to get to the contents you have to unwrap and open the box. There you are met with many options, some are just delicious,  some are gooey, some are chewy, some are hard, and some leave you with a downright awful taste in your mouth. Relationships pretty much have the same characteristics, but in order to fully appreciate their potential, you have to dive in and take that bite, maybe it's exactly what you were hoping for, maybe it's not. But there is always that special sweet in the middle of the box, and that is the always the best tasting- much like  the relationship with the self. In order to be able to be fully present in any relationship, you have to have a loving relationship with yourself. And this is not always easy for us, sometimes there is fear of unwrapping and getting to the center- that others won't like our real flavor, so it's better to keep it all wrapped inside and just be part of the big box. As long as we hide from ourselves we are never fully able to reach our dharma, which is our real reason for being here. In relationships we don't need another person to complete us- we already are perfectly complete, we just have to open our heart.  And that relationship with the self is by far the best , much like that chocolate covered cherry. And when you understand and love yourself for who you are, imperfections and all it enables you to connect and deepen your relationship with others.
So what are you waiting for......unwrap the box!

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